Heard on the Mall

Yes it is time for gossip. What? College professors gossip? I'm personally shocked. But here are a few bits.
1. It is rumored that the provost has said Tom Brady will not be the dean of Arts and Sciences. While many of us are relieved let's make certain we understand what was not said. She did not say he might not be the dean of a college of Arts and Letters or the next president of UT. Gosh I love gossip.
2. It is my understanding that the provost wants all faculty misbehaviors to go through the provost's office and not be judged by fellow faculty. I wonder how that would play with the doctors over at Health Sciences? By the by the next time the want a provost over there I want the job. Nice bonus. Heck if Brady can run Education Dr. Tinkle can certainly run a little old hospital. Right?
3. As tenured faculty in A & S become a thing of the past, I assume they'll start recruiting trained seals from the Zoo.
4. Taking credit for increased enrollment during hard economic times is like taking credit for the sun rising.